My Autistic Boy And Other Adventures In Fatherhood

Mommy had some friends over last night, so we went out to see the Transformers movie…now before you get on me about only writing about ‘boy movies’ and such, let me just clearly state that we watch more than our fair share of ‘Drake and Josh’ because Maya has a crush on Drake (she doesn’t know that yet…she just knows she really, really likes him) and we own Cinderella, the Little Mermaid, Mulan…and we see movies she likes…but with all the advertising of this flick they do on Nickelodeon, well, she was hyped to see it too.

I’m no professional movie reviewer, but we’ve been excited to see the big three this summer (too little for Harry Potter, so we scratch that off the list) and D loved all three, but I’m a bit surprised that I liked Transformers the best. I’d see it again at the movies: it’s a bit loud and a tad too long, but very enjoyable.  I’m not sure I’d pay $7 to see Spider Man 3 or the Fantastic Four again…but this one was just fun.  It certainly didn’t take itself too seriously.

Maya liked it to.  Here are her comments:

1 – Maya would like a car that turns into a robot. But she would like her car not to be yellow
2 – She sure thought that the girl in the movie was pretty, and she even had black hair too (this makes me wonder if she is recognizing the value/benefits of being blonde at the age of five?)
3 – She would like to change Buddy’s name to Mojo (name of the pet dog in the movie)
4 – We need a fountain in our backyard
5 – What is a Ding Dong? When it was explained to her that it is a small, round chocolate cake with chocolate icing and cream in the middle, she wanted to try one. She told me to go get one for her at the ‘front of the movies where they make the popcorn.’  

We all watch these movies and see different things.  As you can tell here, Maya has no problem asking questions and talking during the movie either. Since there were only about seven folks in the theatre, not a problem answering her questions.  Demetrius? Didn’t say boo in the movies except that he wanted more popcorn.  Cars turning into talking robots…. c’mon, do we even know that our sister is sitting two seats down from us? Do we care?  Demetrius wants to change into a robot post movie; Maya wants chocolate covered Hostess cake products.

It was a winner of a movie and evening.

Everything went according to plan until about 5:00 pm yesterday. I got the luggage at baggage claim once their plane landed, and then I saw the three of them. I have no doubt, like every dad/husband who misses his family; the smile on my face was ear-to-ear.

Demetrius grabbed my neck and stroked my beard… and as is the case to his particulars, repeatedly ad naseum about how he missed me, and that I was his ‘friend’. Maya jumped up into my arms. At five, she is still small enough to want to be held as toddlers do when she gets excited – she wants that enveloping hug that daddys can give. She also wants that lifted off her feet feeling. Hard to do it when Demetrius is hanging on my neck. Some way, some how, we all managed to get what we wanted out of the moment. Some way, some how, I managed to sneak a kiss in for Kim, maybe a hug too? Hope she didn’t feel too left out.

We then went out to eat for a big lunch at the OK Cafe, one of my favorite eateries on the other side of suburban Atlanta (I-75/Cobb County side) from where we live, which everyone loved (old American diner/southern comfort food ). But as soon as the last spoonful of the banana split was eaten, we needed to leave (Maya gave up on the split to eat the Tootsie Rolls the waitress gave us, she’s a candy girl first and foremost) and get on the way home to the computer, the toys, and dog that they had been missing.

Demetrius exited the car as fast as he could once we hit the garage, sprinted up the stairs, turned on the computer and….

Demetrius: Daddy, something with the computer is wrong, I can’t watch my movies on the computer!

Daddy: Demetrius, Daddy fixed the computer so you can only play games on the computer, not watch movies.

Demetrius: Not watch movies (agitation turns to astonishment…quickly from astonishment to anger!)?

Daddy: Right, no more movies on the computer, only computer games.

Demetrius: You are not my friend! You are mean to me! I’m telling Mommy!

Demetrius proceeds down the stairs, stops to see a man about a horse, drops his toys in the middle of the floor and heads outside to where Kim is inspecting the work we had done on the house (according to the boss it looks pretty good, whew!).

The Thing, laying face down on the hardwoods by the staircase. He’s in a dark depression. He feels Demetrius’ pain of not being able to watch and stim on movies on the computer…..

Kim, attempting to inspect the front of the house for approval of contractor work. Buddy forcing her to pay the appropriate toll for being out of town for two weeks….Demetrius is about to enter this scene from the garage….first he had to pee….he’s in need of all his powers of influence to move Mommy against Daddy.  Poor Demetrius, he has no idea he’s Poland, she’s the USSR and I’m Germany. He’s stuck in the middle without a strong army….(any one who likes history, is Polish {doubtful on the ‘is Polish’, can anyone who’s Polish actually read? Thus, this blog is beyond them} or plays alot of Risk understands what I’m saying here…..)

Demetrius: Mommy! Daddy is mean! He is mean to me! He is not my friend! Make him put the movies back on the computer!

Mommy: No, Demetrius – no more movies on the computer. Daddy is right. Only computer games.

Demetrius breaks down. This will be hard. There is no transition-for-the-autistic-kid-methodology here. However we did it, whenever we did it, it would be painful and angst ridden. There were tears, and autistic OCDing about watching movies on the computer until he fell asleep at bedtime.

Nonetheless, Demetrius cries, and cries, and cries, and goes back upstairs to the computer room.

Demetrius: Daddy! Maya is on the computer playing Hello Kitty games! It is my turn!

Maya: You went outside and cried like a baby! It is my turn now! YOU LEAVE! IT IS MY TURN NOW!

I figure it is about 356 days until they leave for their next fortnight in Kansas….

Good to have the noise of my real life back in the house. ☺

• 3:30am - took Buddy for a 4 mile run
• 5:30am - Left for the airport
• 6:00am - Rode MARTA train to airport!
• 7:00am - Got to stand in line to meet nice security folks at the airport
• 8:45 am - 2 hour plane flight
• 10:45 am - Land in Omaha
• 2pm - Arrive in Carroll, IA

Yes, I’m officially tired, and it is 2:24pm, but feels like 7pm.

Here are some photos:

Demetrius, Hartsfield Jackson Airport/Atlanta, GA….approximately 7:30am, in a stall in the men’s room, singing a song from SpongeBob Square Pants called, “Victory, Sweet Victory.”  This is after I fished him out of the women’s restroom, telling a lady in a stall to hurry up because he had ‘to really go poopy.’  The picture doesn’t do justice to his legs swinging back and forth in front of the stall as he sang. Poor guy next to him trying to read USA Today….

Reading books, waiting to take off for Omaha…..

More to come….PS, we went to Burger King in Carroll, IA for lunch….THEY HAD SILVER SURFER TOYS!

Last night Kim had some friends over, so the kids and me skiddadled and went to the movies to see Surfs Up. I actually found it humorous – a bit better than Shrek 3, if you ask me.

They had a life sized Silver Surfer in the lobby (see picture) to hype the Fantastic Four movie that starts on Friday. Demetrius wants one for his room. That, I would have to admit, would be way cool. Maya liked the Simpson family across the theater’s lobby. I doubt she has any idea about the Simpsons – but it was cute to see her sitting in front of Bart and Maggie, none-the-less.

Movies now have Disney like figures next to the concession stand. It certainly excites the wee-ones. When they have a life sized Brad Pitt, I’ll bring that one home for Kim, like I’ll do with the Silver Surfer for Demetrius….

When I told Demetrius we had tickets to go see the Fantastic Four movie on Friday night, he looked at me and said, “Fishpaste!” (Ahhhh, SpongeBob).

Daddy: What’s wrong Demetrius?

Demetrius: Tomorrow, at 8pm, Eastern, the SpongeBob Square Pants Movie is on Nickelodeon. It’s a summer movie event.

Daddy: We are seeing the Fantastic Four tomorrow night at 8pm.

Demetrius: No! Fishpaste!

Demetrius: Maybe we go to see the Silver Surfer earlier, and then come home and watch the SpongeBob movie?

Daddy: No, Demetrius, we are seeing the Fantastic Four movie. SpongeBob we can watch any other time.

Demetrius: Okay Daddy, but can we go to Burger King first to get a Silver Surfer toy before the movie?

They tell me that some of the best negotiators in the world were the Soviets. They would just sit at the table and wear you down discussing point after point in a contract/deal/agreement until you focused on one point, and then hit you hard when you were worn down on a completely different point hoping the other side of the table would just break down.

As you can see, in his style, Demetrius would make a great Soviet negotiator. Fortunately, or unfortunately for the boy, Daddy won’t get home in time for him to get everything he wants tomorrow night, dinner and a movie, and another movie on Nickelodeon. ☺

But if you don’t ask, you don’t get….

Spider Man was all that it was cracked up to be….I won’t be some high-falutin’ Hollywood type here that will comment on lighting on the set or tonality…it was just fun to sit, eat popcorn, and watch trailers of super hero movies lead into the mother of all super hero movies…with my son.

I’m not sure on Friday that there was a female in the movie theatre.  There had to be, but I didn’t see one.

The humor came about an hour and a half into the movie: when Venom speaks for the first time.  Lots of big, scary shark-like teeth….he has a conversation about teaming up with the Sandman to kill Spider Man…and you hear, “Okay Daddy! Now I’m scared!”

Chuckles…nervous chuckles….all these dads watching this movie with their sons are now worried that the ‘scare-di-ness’ will spread to the seat next to you, infecting your wee-one.  No dice. Demetrius was committed.

We got home at about 10pm and, surprise, we were not tired - we needed to find every single Spider Man toy in the house… now!  Even after filling the gullet with more popcorn than humanly possible to eat, we were not tired.  After wrestling Demetrius down (a little post-’hyper about the movie’ sensory input) he crashed.  He wasn’t tired…

Then the rest of the weekend was crazy. Another school carnival….friends over…pretending to be Mommy and Daddy…..losing another tooth…

But if you ask the boy, what was the best part of the weekend?

The Fantastic Four preview!

Its what you don’t have…yet, that is most appealing. Spider Man 3? Been there, done that.  Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer?  That’s hot stuff….

Looks like I’m booked for a certain Friday night in mid-June!