My Autistic Boy And Other Adventures In Fatherhood

Mommy had some friends over last night, so we went out to see the Transformers movie…now before you get on me about only writing about ‘boy movies’ and such, let me just clearly state that we watch more than our fair share of ‘Drake and Josh’ because Maya has a crush on Drake (she doesn’t know that yet…she just knows she really, really likes him) and we own Cinderella, the Little Mermaid, Mulan…and we see movies she likes…but with all the advertising of this flick they do on Nickelodeon, well, she was hyped to see it too.

I’m no professional movie reviewer, but we’ve been excited to see the big three this summer (too little for Harry Potter, so we scratch that off the list) and D loved all three, but I’m a bit surprised that I liked Transformers the best. I’d see it again at the movies: it’s a bit loud and a tad too long, but very enjoyable.  I’m not sure I’d pay $7 to see Spider Man 3 or the Fantastic Four again…but this one was just fun.  It certainly didn’t take itself too seriously.

Maya liked it to.  Here are her comments:

1 – Maya would like a car that turns into a robot. But she would like her car not to be yellow
2 – She sure thought that the girl in the movie was pretty, and she even had black hair too (this makes me wonder if she is recognizing the value/benefits of being blonde at the age of five?)
3 – She would like to change Buddy’s name to Mojo (name of the pet dog in the movie)
4 – We need a fountain in our backyard
5 – What is a Ding Dong? When it was explained to her that it is a small, round chocolate cake with chocolate icing and cream in the middle, she wanted to try one. She told me to go get one for her at the ‘front of the movies where they make the popcorn.’  

We all watch these movies and see different things.  As you can tell here, Maya has no problem asking questions and talking during the movie either. Since there were only about seven folks in the theatre, not a problem answering her questions.  Demetrius? Didn’t say boo in the movies except that he wanted more popcorn.  Cars turning into talking robots…. c’mon, do we even know that our sister is sitting two seats down from us? Do we care?  Demetrius wants to change into a robot post movie; Maya wants chocolate covered Hostess cake products.

It was a winner of a movie and evening.

Hope everyone had a great holiday weekend. We had the Grasso grandparents in town (Nonni and Grandpa) and Kim’s sister, Rachel, and her husband, Cam. Full house, full of fun.

Kim’s nephew, Garrett, was throwing the javelin in the NCAA national championship track and field tournament in Charlotte. Not bad for a freshman, eh? So Rachel, Cam and Kim all drove up to watch him toss the stick. Every time they talk about him throwing I think of Monty Python’s javelin catching skit. I know, I have the mind of a 12 year old.

Unfortunately, Garrett apparently got the jitters and did what freshmen do, freeze up a bit. But wow, to be 18 years old and throwing in the national championship, what a rush that had to have been for him. Next year he’ll be a sophomore, have all of this under his belt, and will, of course, win the whole shebang. Don’t know if it will be in Charlotte again for Aunt Kim to go and watch.

Here at Casa Grasso, we attempted to do what we do best – wear out Nonni and Grandpa. This was our Saturday routine:
• Jerry runs with running group
• Shower, give everyone baths, to see Shrek the Third at 10:30 am
• Buy three new pairs of shoes, sneakers for Demetrius, sandals/shoes for Maya
• To Target to buy more toys (grandparents = suckers)
• Lunch
• Home to play new computer games for one hour
• Walk Buddy
• Take kids to swimming pool for two hours
• Home to play more computer games
• Go get pizza for dinner
• Watch Spongebob and play more new computer games (the kids got, like, 7 I think)

Sunday was very much of the same – minus the shopping.

So what was great about this? Well, take away Demetrius’ OCD, “When are we going to Target?” “Now are we going to Target?” “After this are we going to Target?” He was extremely engaged.

And I saw something yesterday that just had me beaming.

At one point, before the kids went to show off for Grandpa how well they ride their bikes, Demetrius was sitting in the living room with some new toys (all Spider Man 3 action figures, of course), and he was doing some imaginative play. I would say watching him, it was more in line with what you would expect of an older toddler, 4 year old, in this respect (Maya’s already done this type of play and is onto more complicated tea parties with stuffed bears, having slumber parties for them, etc…) but he kept at for about 10 minutes. That is a long time for him to entertain himself, and he just sat there and played. I’d love to see more of that, but if you jump in, or start talking to him, he’ll stop and let you start to lead for him…which is absolutely not what I want him to do. Maybe we’ll see a lot more of this throughout the summer.

A couple of funnies from the weekend:
• The fam went out to Buca di Beppo for dinner. Lots of statues Maya noticed of men with their ‘weenies covered by leaves’. She also noted that this form of ‘clothing’ would be ‘itchy’
• Nonni opens the suitcases with toys, she pays for the new pair of shoes for Maya and pays for toys at Target. Demetrius mentioned that he wanted to go to Target again (why not? It’s here, Nonni and Grandpa are here…why not visit the store 3-4 times a trip?) and Maya told him to, “Ask Nonni, she has all the monies”
• You have to wear ‘expensive’ shoes to a wedding. Like you would get at Target or Kohls
• I started to get my stuff ready for work last night and Demetrius told me I couldn’t go to the office, “I don’t have school, you don’t have to go to the office!” Wouldn’t that be nice?

Finally, below is our family picture from the Autism Walk a few Saturdays ago. Again, thank you to everyone for participating. We are very, very grateful for your donations and support…with your help we raised about $3700.

Team Super D..with a little bit of Buddy in the photo….

Spider Man was all that it was cracked up to be….I won’t be some high-falutin’ Hollywood type here that will comment on lighting on the set or tonality…it was just fun to sit, eat popcorn, and watch trailers of super hero movies lead into the mother of all super hero movies…with my son.

I’m not sure on Friday that there was a female in the movie theatre.  There had to be, but I didn’t see one.

The humor came about an hour and a half into the movie: when Venom speaks for the first time.  Lots of big, scary shark-like teeth….he has a conversation about teaming up with the Sandman to kill Spider Man…and you hear, “Okay Daddy! Now I’m scared!”

Chuckles…nervous chuckles….all these dads watching this movie with their sons are now worried that the ‘scare-di-ness’ will spread to the seat next to you, infecting your wee-one.  No dice. Demetrius was committed.

We got home at about 10pm and, surprise, we were not tired - we needed to find every single Spider Man toy in the house… now!  Even after filling the gullet with more popcorn than humanly possible to eat, we were not tired.  After wrestling Demetrius down (a little post-’hyper about the movie’ sensory input) he crashed.  He wasn’t tired…

Then the rest of the weekend was crazy. Another school carnival….friends over…pretending to be Mommy and Daddy…..losing another tooth…

But if you ask the boy, what was the best part of the weekend?

The Fantastic Four preview!

Its what you don’t have…yet, that is most appealing. Spider Man 3? Been there, done that.  Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer?  That’s hot stuff….

Looks like I’m booked for a certain Friday night in mid-June!

I forgot one other Demetrius thing this week…on top of the IEP…he has an appt. with a neurologist to go over some ‘anomalies’ found in his EEG from last year. If you remember, last summer (assuming you are a long time reader) the boy had a seizure and after a bevy of tests – these anomalies showed up. Well, we finally got booked with the neurologist – so we’ll see what he says.

What a week for this kid!

Of course, he’s mostly unaware. As long as he’s not getting a shot at the doctor, it ain’t too big of a deal for him.

Last night I got home from the trip and the kids eagerly ran up to me when I walked through the door. They feign love. I see right through them. The hugs and the ‘Daddy! You are home!’ statements are quickly followed up with, “Where’s our gifts?”

Maya was completely enthralled with the Tinker Bell toy I got her. Demetrius was completely psyched, he got a ‘Venom’ action figure from the upcoming Spider Man movie.

Happy with these, sure… But why not more?

Demetrius: Daddy?

Daddy: Yes, Demetrius?

Demetrius: You were supposed to get me Venom and the Green Goblin.

Daddy: Demetrius, how about a thank you for the gift. Be happy that you got one at all!

Demetrius: Daddy?

Daddy: Yes Demetrius (a bit more sternly this time)

Demetrius: Get in your car and go to Target to get me Green Goblin, please.

At least I got please.